How NOT to Spiritual Bypass: A Practical Guide to Avoid “Love and Light”

Following my critique of ‘love and light’ spirituality that has become so prevalent in New Age communities, I also wanted to offer some actionable suggestions.

Critiquing “love and light” doesn’t mean rejecting care. It means refusing sentimental shortcuts and committing to the full work: the luminous practices of compassion and clarity and the difficult, necessary labour of shadow work and death work. Shadow work asks us to notice what is hidden, such as rage, grief, structural harm, and to sit with it until it can be transformed. Death work teaches endings, ritual closure, and how to make space for what must be released. Both are essential if compassion is to be accountable and real.

These are behaviours and habits you can adopt personally, in groups, and in ritual spaces to make sure compassion isn’t merely performative.

1. Slow the sentiment; act the responsibility.
Before offering a platitude, ask: what concrete step can I take right now to address this harm or need? Say that first, and follow through. Feeling warm and fuzzy is not a substitute for labour.