I WAS TAUGHT GIVING IS “GOOD”, AND RECEIVING IS BAD…
I was taught as a child (and throughout my life) that giving is “good” and receiving is “bad”. That sharing, especially as a host, is to be extended at lengths that can be defined almost as “at all costs”. Giving / sharing when expected to, when not expected to, as a form of not being able to feel what I feel, or to simply say “no” or even “wait”. I was taught to feel that receiving is greedy, shameful, weak, or that I’m “not good enough”.
#STRAIGHTTALK ON WELLNESS & SPIRITUALITY
I can recall a time when originality, nuance, and depth were things to take pride in. In today’s culture one has to shrink it all into a generic elevator pitch or beige hashtag. We are told by marketers and influencers that what we say must be palatable for the mainstream. True stories— I’ve been told by more than one (white) female-owned “wellness” studio / space / workplace that I need to be less “intimidating” by “dumbing down” my knowledge, that by being “too myself”, I’m being too niche. These same establishments also champion themselves as feminists— #bossbabes that #manifest. As if being an entrepreneur has anything to do with gender. And as if it has anything to do with being “fuckable”. The last time I checked, basing a woman’s credibility on her body is defined as sexism.
RESPONSIBLE MANIFESTATION
For the last two months, I've been probing the shadow side of the spiritual notion called the 'Manifestation Principle', and the potentially dangerous misuses of the Law of Attraction, particularly by leaders, healers, and teachers in the wellness and spiritual community. (For those who are just joining this discussion, feel free to read April's story HERE and May's story HERE).
THE SPIRITUAL PRINCIPLE THAT MOST PEOPLE NEVER QUESTION – BUT SHOULD
Perhaps the most used word that ‘woke’ people use these days – whether they are in spiritual circles, wellness circles, or even personal development / business coaching circles – ‘manifesting’ is the ubiquitous buzz word and ever the dangling carrot for many.
UNDER THE NEW MOON: DECOLONIZING, GROWTH, MANIFESTING
Sometimes, my own fears and irrational habits surprise myself. I have internalized oppression of general Chinese/Taiwanese culture (not to mention cultural purging that modern China has experienced) and Christian patriarchy; being a female in a white-centric worldview also adds nuanced complexity. So many painful and limiting layers. So much living small and self-oppression. But I'm hopeful. I think the first step is awareness, then release, and lots and lots of patience and self-love. I find using shamanic and ritual-based practices effective in identifying the limitations as well as work through them. (For those who know me and my work, I’m all about integrating the spiritual with practical, everyday life. Spirituality without real-life application is lip service).